1:88 Autism

1:88 and not an epidemic per the CDC?

That is because they would have a HUGE backlash if they acknowledged anything environmentally was contributing to this enormous spike in the autism diagnosis.

I love my daughter unconditionally ~ quirks and all ~ but the challenges she goes through is not normal... I am not talking nuero-diversity, I am talking the biological complications of autism.

I am not even saying that vaccines caused her autism, she isn't "directly" vaccinated.... but environmental toxins most certainly plays a part and I do have too many friends whose child was typical prior to specific vaccines....

Our government needs to eat crow and acknowledge the role big pharma, industrialized farming, food additives, petroleum tar-based dyes in our foods, approved household chemicals, industrialized birthing practices etc plays not in just autism, but all childhood disorders that are at an all time high... cancer, adhd, diabetes, ms, down syndrome, add, anxiety, ocd, sensory processing disorder, aggression, etc.

Fireworks, Ignorance and Stimming

I was all prepared to embrace our freedom and have a great time with the family. We were going to arrive a bit early, find a remote parking lot and watch the fireworks from a distance to avoid the noise, smell, people, traffic jams... if you or your loved one has autism you know why; sensory sensitivities are debilitating!!

Okay, so plans didn't go as expected... we did arrive early but the traffic was insane. Sahara kept signing for 'sparklers' and I tried to get her to understand that fireworks are like sparklers only in the sky. People were blowing their horns, playing loud music and one even yelled 'fucker' at me when I hesitated to go forward because he was looking down AND heading straight at me... I know it makes no sense to me either. My hubby told me to shake it off... I tried, but his words stung!

Of course I was already feeling on edge... we had had pizza for dinner a couple of hours earlier and prior to that Emily and I shared nachos and pop corn at the theater. I am sure my blood sugar levels were soaring; I was short and snippy... fully aware of it, but I couldn't stop. It is so frustrating to have emotions that you have no control over... really, really frustrating.

Anyways, back to the fireworks... we found a parking lot right off main street which only had 2 cars with a perfect view towards the designated show. It was close enough to have a good view and far enough away to zoom away if needed. We backed in next to one of the cars there and opened the back to my jeep. The kids forced themselves to get comfy in the blankets. Ahhh!!

Being on Main Street we were privy to the late traffic jammers... people can be so rude when the are stressed and overwhelmed. I am certain they lost sight of the whole reason we were there in the first place... to celebrate our Freedom!! But, I had too... Freedom was the farthest thing from my mind.

A few kids started throwing snaps at each other's feet; it would have been cute if it didn't make Emily wish she had brought our's. Then they pulled out the sparklers; now Sahara was even more insistent in her signing, 'sparklers?' I was almost relieved when their supply ran out, until they started to set off smoke bombs and yep, we were down wind!!

Finally, the kids settle down and in whips a blue van right next to ours. They are blaring base thumping so loud my inner core thumped with it. Sahara puts her hands on her ears as I give them a subtle look. All the kids in the van are banging their heads to this noise along with the adults. I am thinking hard how to approach them to let them know that our child has a disability that causes her to be sensitive to certain sounds... I am at a loss and certain I could find no such words. And even if I thought I had, they didn't look like the type of people to offer me compassionate understanding.

In the mean time Sahara starts to hum... I am sure she is trying to block out the base thumping. Five young kids jump out of the van and I hear them using words like "Jesus Christ" "Fuck" and "Retard"... my blood is boiling!! I try not to let it show, but I am sure everyone knows that I am pissed... especially my own family. I am certain I am ruining their good time.

I start to deep breath and ask for patience.

Suddenly a red van pulls infront of our jeep... blocking the exit path I carefully orchestrated. I am okay though.... I quickly decide if it gets much worse (and trust me it did) I could just back our jeep up onto main street and leave. My sense of relief is popped as the 7 people jump out of their van and plop a cooler full of beer and blanket five feet from the back of the jeep... they pinned us in completely!!

Not only were they blocking our view to the much anticipated (now almost dreaded) fireworks, they lit cigarettes and cracked opened beer cans... all down wind. I feel completely assulted.... thumping base on one side of me and cigarette smoke in my face... I look at my family and yearn to protect them. I can only imagine with their heightened sensitivities how they must be feeling.

Both girls found their way on the ground to play in the dirt and gravel... I presume they were seeking a sensory activity to soothe their assaulted systems... playing in dirt is always gratifying to me. It feels so calm to have the smooth grains go between my fingers and palms. They looked filthy and it made me chuckle... leave it to my daughters to find their way to the Earth to ground themselves from their environment.

When Sahara is done she is more agitated than before because now she is dirty and wants water and a towel to clean herself up, "Why didn't I better prepare?!?!" She starts to orally stim and of course our assailants of the night begin to snap looks at us... they are oblivious that it was their rude disregard that started the vocalizations. Of course they are too self absorbed to notice andmost likely ignorant of autism to comprehend the discomfort my child is experiencing. In fact, I am certain that the first van load turned up the base intentionally when the noted my obvious disapproval.

As the loud show begins Sahara's face lights up! Once again, I am feeling tender about a moment that demonstrates how far we have come... prior to this year, she had never taken note to the beautiful shimmering light in the sky... she is breathless and utters, "Wow, it's beautiful!" I well up with emotion... I note to myself that if only everyone could see this through her virgin eyes that they would experience the true meaning of Independence Day. Liberty is within her as autism loosens it's clutches.

Emily is speechless and rolls over onto her tummy. I am certain she is categorizing each design so she can recreate them in her journal over the week. My heart aches at the pain she has endured in the shadow of autism... she takes everything on. I am relieved at the moment of loosing herself into the show. I presume this is why I try to do this every year...

I want her (both of them) to have a chance at normalcy as much as possible. I presume that the notion of normalcy is over-rated and romanticized... but I try. Sometimes I think that it is the siblings that have a more difficult time. They carry burdens with them... well, at least my girl does. She worries about her sister constantly and always puts her first, but she struggles with quiet resentment too. I try my best to support her, but it is hard!

These are the things that wake up my demons inside. I see the rugrats in the van parked next to us... dis-shelved and unruly; talking worse than sailors as the parents throw out threats of physical harm and the kids retort with disrespect. I think about how hard I try to be mindful about everything I do, and how guilty I feel for being moody (probably from the sugar levels I am learning) and I become infuriated at the obvious injustice.

Then I remember, better me than them. I can handle this... I know I can!! We will get through this moment of torture just like others and be stronger and more empowered than the moment before.

The fireworks are loud even at a distance and we are blocked in; Sahara begins to run in circles while humming. I don't even try to intervene... I know this is the only way she has to soothe herself in this moment.

On the way home Sahara was stimming with intensity; rocking, hand flapping and humming. I knew she was trying to calm herself down, but nonetheless I felt helpless. I wanted to make her pain and discomfort subside. However, I know when I am upset I am about useless to her... well, that probably isn't true, but it certainly feels like it. I know I need to tend to my needs so I can be better present for both of my kids... and let's not forget for my husband as well.

I am not sure we will do this again next year or ever... As for today we have less stimming, but it is still present. I am sure her system is trying to re-regulate. I hope someday that others in our global community become aware of the sensitivities and impact they have on this generation of youth.

Cell Phones: Luxury or Need?

We are changing cell phone plans and I had this great idea... close the first and post pone the second as long as I can to see how long we can go.

Yes, my primary motive was saving money... We are still recouping from hubby being out of work for 6 months after being downsized right before the holidays.

But, as I thought about it, I started wondering if the controversial frequencies they emit really affect our health & well-being and do they pollute our air & environment? As you know these are the thoughts that keep me up at night.

Then I started wondering, if the cell phone tower or the "phone company" building that was next to the building I worked when pregnant with Sahara, could have contributed to the infantile autism? Purely based on the energy model... it most certainly is probable.

Of course there is also my consideration that the age of industrialization is doing more global harm then good. And I am talking on a spiritual, physical and emotional level.

Industrialization has introduced more pollutants in our environment than ever before (BP oil spill case in point). It has torn families apart as they moved away from family farming to the city life. We have left our elders who helped us raise and guide our young children... now strangers turned childcare providers are caring for our kids.

I could go on... but you get the point.

Back to the cell-phone issue... My big question was can we do without this modern day luxury that is now viewed as a need?? Is it possible in the 21st century to forfeit something that we have created the construct of necessity for?

After all, this is precisely the experiment I did with cable TV 5 years ago. And, yes, we still are cable free... Instead of television, we now play games, go to parks, read books, and nurture our bodies, minds and relationships naturally.

Well, 4 weeks is a far cry from 5 years... but, we are on week 4 of no cell phones and I don't miss it (other than the Long Distance calling). I miss calling my mom anytime. Especially since I can't just hop in the car and drive to her house... she lives 3 hours away.

Of course my IT hubby is probably going insane. He has had phones attached to the hip for years... I would think not being at the beckon call of others would be refreshing to him. He says he misses not being in touch with me and the girls. That is valid. If there is an emergency we are no longer connected like we were with the phone.

I presume that that is our biggest hurdle. What if Sahara gets lost in a crowd or what if there is an emergency when we are in the community... what do I do?

And now that we are in the height of tween-dom with Emily, we have promised her that when we order our new phones, she is to get her own. Not because we want her to be hip, but for the same reasons I think we need one. Remember the dime our mothers used to give us when we went out with our friends, "If you need anything call me!"

Have you noticed phone booths are a thing of the past?

So, I am on the line... now pun intended. Do we go another 4 weeks of my experiment or do we bite the bullet of the industrialization age and buy the new phones and plans.?

Oil Spill, Meditation and Eradication

The oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is going to impact our planet, children and grandchildren, ecology, economy, etc. for centuries to come... that is if we survive it at all!! I watch videos, view pictures and read story after story; and my heart aches for our planet and mankind. I can’t help but worry about what devastation this will behind. I pray, but I am not sure that is enough.

I try not to focus on the obvious detriment of the situation. I firmly believe in the law of attraction and know my thoughts can and do create my reality. So, I try to meditate and focus on purified waters, a healthy marine habitat and a repaired oil tank. I figure that if the scientists and engineers who are armed with technology cannot fix the massive oil rig tank, then surely our thoughts can.

Well, I have to admit that is even hard for me to ascertain. I try, but I keep returning to thoughts of destruction and greed. I cannot help but to beg the power and money hungry individuals in charge to get off their duff and do something about this before it kills not only the planet, but the people who inhabit her too!! Stop defending Big Oil and take action!!

I feel like my pleas are met on deaf ears. I contemplate that if the powers to be can make vulgar statements about the oil spill and not take proper action to remedy the situation, and then it is very possible that the same greedy bastards could be making vulgar statements to discredit concerned parents and deny vaccine injury while continuing to pump that toxicity into our bodies? Sadly, this makes me feel validated. Sadly, this is probably close to the truth.

We live in a corrupt society where money and power make us do things that are incomprehensible. We turn the cheek when it doesn’t directly affect us or when we are seemingly removed. But, I have to say that we are not removed from either of these scenarios. Our children are being vaccine damaged as well as poisoned by toxins and pesticides in their foods as well as in their toys. Just this week alone 2 children’s items were recalled for containing cadmium… Miley Cyrus brand Jewelry at Walmart and Shrek glassware at Mc Donald’s.

And yet, we think it to be so farfetched that vaccines might contain harmful ingredients? Another story surfaced this week about a congressional committee that is investigating what they are calling a ‘phantom recall’ on Johnson and Johnson division, Mc Neil’s, Motrin. Apparently, the company outsourced contractors to have individuals go into stores and buy the entire product on the shelf to prevent a nationwide recall.

There are some tainted business practices occurring and it is mankind that is paying. Of course, Sarah Palin would like to blame the ‘Radical Environmentalists’ for the recent Oil Spill, but we know better. It is a world full of greed and this too shall bite us in the ass. This spill will effect far more than the Gulf. It will affect the entire mother earth and her inhabitants. You know I think she will survive… but not without causalities. Mankind has been eradicated before, and we are not too far from it again. We are but a mere virus on her and her immune system is about to eliminate us.

I pray that I am wrong for our sake, for our children's sake, and for the sake of this planet that gives us life.

Unity Among the Autism Community

On the eve of April - Autism Awareness month, I feel compelled to get this off my chest. See I have been holding my tongue for some time and I absolutely cannot stand it anymore. The ‘infighting’ among the autism community grates at my inner core and I find myself needing to come forth in order to release the charged feelings I am experiencing ... I understand it may not do any good, but at least I will have said my peace.

At a time when autism numbers are soaring, we need the mainstream folk to become involved. And yet, our own community cannot support one another despite our differences … How, I ask, can we possibly expect others to take a stand and advocate for us, when we can’t do so for each other? It is time to set aside our differences and unite for the greater good of the autism community as a whole.

Our children (and adults) diagnosed with autism need support, protection, advocacy, and empowerment as well as other necessities.

Personally, dare I say, that I actually relate to both sides in my own unique way; the neuro-diveristy and the pro-cure. I don’t think that makes me hypocritical. I am just a concerned mindful mother wanting the best for her child.

The nuero-diversity camp promotes that we accept our differences and honor each person in their unique sense of self. Truthfully, that really is the foundation of my personal advocacy group, Exceptional Beyond Labels. I, also, believe that despite any label (autism, aspergers, pdd-nos, ect) that each person behind the label is just that… A PERSON! They are a person not defined by this label, but rather a person defined by their unique individualization... And that person is phenomenal and capable of anything given the proper tools. Autism is not something to be ashamed of, in fact, I believe it is those on the autism spectrum that will make profound changes in the systems that are no longer working in our world(but, that is a whole different blog entry). I believe that all research and programming and legislation should include parents and adults on the spectrum ... I agree that we cannot determine their future without their input!!

On the flip-side, I find myself praying for a cure and requesting unbiased 3^rd party research. I long for a day that the ‘infantile autism’ label that limits my child is shed like the skin on a snake. I am motivated to prove the diagnosing psychologist wrong when she said to us without a blink of an eye that our young daughter would never have a productive career, meaningful friendships, marriage, a college education or independent living. I have read countless books and surf the net to wee hours of the night to discover what others are doing to help their child diagnosed with autism to 'recover', so that I might be able to pull her further into our world closer to a functional life. I have tried diets, alternative therapies, holistic medicine, traditional therapies, and anything else that was within my arm’s reach. I want, like every parent, to have my child have a bright future full of possibilities.

I don’t do these things to change her core essence, but to remove barriers so that she can have a productive future; to improve her quality of life; to reduce her fundamental frustrations that are demonstrated through a profound expressive and receptive speech delay, an heightened autonomic nervous system response, the sensory and auditory processing complications, a curious eating disorder, awkward socialization skills.... let's not forget that I do this to end the never ending fear of her risk of elopement ending in a catastrophe or to end the nightmares about what will happen to her if her parents were to tragically die or to end the fear that resides in the knowing that if someone were to violate her she would not have the functional words to tell me (and the list goes on) …

I have come to understand that some cases of autism (possibly more aspergers than infantile autism) is genetically based and hereditary while other cases are more environmental. Our geneticist concluded there was no biological foundation for the autism, yet denied environmental possibilities. That doesn't make sense to me. How can biological and environmental factors both be ruled out? This is a hot topic and has caused some to even proclaim hatred towards a certain celebrity. However, I cannot rationalize for one second how the toxins in the vaccines could possibly be safe in the amounts given to the tiny bodies our child inhabit. Yes, I know that the CDC and FDA have cleared them to be safe but common sense tells me otherwise. (I am not going to elaborate on this as there are many resources out there stating the facts… go check them out). I, also, am concerned that no one is talking about maternal vaccine history and its effects on the offspring she bears or the Rho-Gam (Anti-D) vaccine given to pregnant women with negative blood. If the toxins cross the blood brain barrier during critical fetal nuero-development could that not affect the brain and cause autistic-like symptoms?

Now, I do believe that the camp that takes this stance should be less cynical and sarcastic in their presentation … tastefulness goes along way. I wonder if a certain publication ever considers that their point of view would be better accepted by mainstream, the autism community, government, and big-pharm if they added a little more class to their presentation. But, their opponents create face book pages like I Hate Jenny McCarthy. So, what do you do?

This has to stop. We have to have a truce!! We have to say we can understand both perspectives and respect the needs of both parties. We have to stop organizations getting rich off of the challenges our children and adult friends diagnosed with autism face. We have to unit for the common good for all involved regardless of etiology beliefs! We have to unite to promote advocacy, education, safety, insurance inclusion, 3^rd party research, affordable early intervention, awareness of alternative and holistic health modalities, resources on self-esteem building, education advocacy and inclusion, elimination of seclusion and restraint, as well as promote things like education for mainstream professionals like the police, firemen, teachers, store clerks, life guards, and public transit authorities.

We have to put aside our differences for the greater good of our community; a community desperate for answers and desperate for acceptance.

Exceptional Beyond Labels… One Year After the Autism Diagnosis

It is a quiet Halloween morning…. As I sit here, I reflect on how today marks the one year anniversary of Sahara’s formal diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder. Although I thought this would be an emotionally charged day, I feel quite content… and even optimistic.

SAHARA...

When Sahara was 5 months old, like many others on the autism journey, we suspected a hearing loss. The pediatrician nonchalantly dismissed our concerns, but there was always this nagging maternal instinct that something was not right. When we inquired about her speech delay at age 3 the doctor told us and I quote, “…some kids just don’t talk until they are 6.”

After another year of begging professionals to listen to us that something was wrong with our daughter, someone finally listened!! That opened up the door to many, many tests and procedures. She was formally diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder; which prompted even more medical tests. We found that there was little hope for recovery in the western model. In fact, one medical professional told us that she would never get married, go to college, or live independently… she suggested institutionalization. I decided in that moment to prove that professional wrong and became an advocate for my daughter.

We have explored many traditional and non-traditional modalities as we addressed her speech, social, sensory, fine / gross motor, dietary, sleep and cognitive delays. As we track our results, we see many successes and accomplished milestones. Being personally touched by autism has created an empowerment in my inner core. I dedicated my professional life to serving children and helping others in the mental health and alternative health system before this journey… I find it interesting that these collective experiences were cultivating a unique perspective that would be cornerstone to my daughter’s functional expression of life.

It has been exactly one year today since we uttered the word, “autism” in connection with Sahara. As I reflect about the progress we have made, I am reminded of a little 4 year old girl that was once catatonic, nonverbal, isolated in her own world, non-interactive, anti-social, clumsy, stemming vocally, spinning, eating only a few foods, exhausted from irregular sleep patterns, wearing diapers and having tantrums because of fundamental frustrations and sensitivities. That little girl has blossomed into a 5 year old expression of life… yes, my daughter will always see life through different colored lenses, but now we can see that she is exceptional beyond this label... and we are working on a life of independence and fulfillment.

As we continue to develop tools for her to function, we see that she can and will live the life of purpose while her parents hold as of high aspirations for her as her older sister. I even reckon it would be a hoot if Emily and Sahara became Paleontologists working side by side— like they do in their imaginative play together. And yes, maybe a husband, children and we can throw a white picket fence into the mix of possibilities!!

We have come a very long way in just 12 months. …And now as I look at this exceptional child beyond the label of autism, I realize that we have a lifetime commitment to supporting her on the spectrum, but we are dissolving the negative connotations that come with a label. She is Sahara Grace, not autism. 

I recognize that there is much controversy about whether or not you can cure a child of autism… I am not going to go into my perspective on that. However, I will say that Reiki and adjunctive services have started alleviating some of the major issues in this sensitive child. Daily her vocabulary grows. Yes, she still uses echolalia... but at least now we know she is capable of developing speech. Slowly it is emerging. We are seeing evidence of her yearning to interact with others appropriately, and is entering our world more and more. I am amazed how much progress we have made in just one small year!! Regardless of her level of function I will always accept her for who she is just like a parent of a nuero-typical child would. But, each milestone comes with a special joyful celebration.

National School Lunch Week Is A Farce

IF "Healthy school meals contribute to academic achievement and more productive days in the classroom", then why does the same organization making this statement offer processed, over priced non-nutritional garbage to our youth for lunch?

It is national school lunch week, and I am disgusted with the contents of our lunch selections. This week alone the menu consists of:

Monday:

Cheese Nachos or Hot Dog

Seasoned Corn

Assorted Fruit (not fresh)

Milk

Tuesday:

Johnny Marzetti or Texas grilled cheese

Tomato Soup

Assorted Fruit

Milk

Wednesday:

Pancakes w Sausage or Asian Vegtables w Rice

Hashbrown Patty

Assorted Fruit

Milk

Thursday:

Chicken cheese burrito or Cheesy Bread

Seasoned Green Beans

Assorted Friut

Milk

So, I am not a nutritionist and I do have so much more to learn about this topic. However, It doesn't take a dietitian to see that these lunches are full of complex carbohydrates. Certainly, most of this menu is tainted with high fructose corn syrup, pesticides, preservatives and artificial ingredients. Where is the real food? The fresh fruit and vegetables? A good source of protein?

Is it no wonder our children are struggling academically and socially? Yet alone, they are faced with childhood obesity and juvenile diabetes at higher rates than ever before. As they face a depletion of essential nutrients their minds, bodies, and emotions are suffering. I once read an article that said it would cost the parents $4 per lunch to provide a lunch like I am advocating...

There is no way a parent is going to shuffle out $20 per kid per week for lunch, right? Maybe or maybe not... I can't answer that.

But, I am not so sure that a healthy lunch would cost that much. I am not sure where they get there numbers... I spend probably half of that amount on fresh foods for lunches per child per week. (which is still less than the amount I'd be spending if I were to purchase their lunches from the current school cafeteria menu.) Knowing that the companies providing lunches would purchase in bulk, I don't know how they come up with these numbers.

My Name Is Not Autism!

We have have been excelling in just about every aspect of this thing in our lives called autism; making progress with leaps and bounds. Yes, I know we have a long way to go, but it is in those seemingly small triumphs (like hearing a pronoun escape those lips) that we continue to aim for the monumental finish line. This is a race I not only got roped into without consent, but it is also one I will finish with vigor!

As we propel forward I have changed some of my thinking.... I have stopped saying that my daughter is autistic, instead I say she is diagnosed with autism. See if she is something it is here to stay. She is a girl... She is a sister... She is O-... those things won't change. But, diagnoses and labels can be (and are) removed.

My daughter in not autism, my daughter is experiencing autism.

My agenda is not hidden. My goal is to get my daughter beyond this label. Not for my benefit but hers. I know that will piss some people off. In fact, I know several camps that will claim that is impossible or that this is not all accepting of her. But, I challenge that. As we recover from the toxins that soared through her body as a fetus and infant we start to see glimpses of the Sahara Grace that would have been...

Is it wrong to want to know that child? Is it wrong to yearn for her recovery? Is it wrong to say that I won't stop this fight until the label is gone and she is able to function normally? Is it wrong to yearn to hear her thoughts, dreams and aspirations? Is it wrong to want for her to fit in with her peers without obvious deficits? Is it wrong that I get pissed off that her childhood was stolen from her? ... from her sister?

The answer is simple: no!

It isn't about the label... it is about the stigma, the deficits, the inability to effectively communicate, the lack of peer interaction, the sensitivities that interrupt the seemingly simple daily tasks, the freaking moments she can't tell me what is happening to her when I am not there to protect her...

We will conquer autism. Not because we don't love her for who she is today; that person's attributes are beyond words!! She is an incredible soul with lots of love, humor, wit, and charm. But because we want more for her than the constant feedback, "She is such a sweet child!" or "Isn't she pretty?" Yes, she is sweet and pretty.... but she is more that that. Often people say these things when the autism is in the forefront of her day.

I am sure they think this comforts me and makes me feel better. But, honestly it pushes buttons deep within me. She is more than a sweet child or a pretty girl... she is Sahara Grace, and she has so much she wants to teach the world, so much hidden in this fog that she wants to express, feeling that are bound in her, and accomplishments waiting to be recognized.

She is Sahara Grace... not autism!!

In My Opinion... This Doesn't Lay to Rest the Connection

“Latest autism figures should dispel any fears about the MMR jab being linked to the condition, say experts.”

This article jabs my buttons…

Autism rates back MMR jab safety

By Michelle Roberts Health reporter, BBC News

One of the arguments that many (including myself) have used about the autism/vaccine connection is that you just don’t see 1 out of 100 adults walking around with autism. Yes, there ARE some, but those numbers just are not as staggering as those among our youth, right? Well, according to a resent “small” study that is precisely what is occurring. Yep, that is the claim; 1 out of 100 adults do indeed have autism.

Assuming you read the article, I will share some of my thoughts…

How were the 7500 participants in this study selected? AND by what criteria were they classified? Was there enough diversity in its selection to be able to generalize this to the entire adult population concluding that this disproves the MRR/autism connection?

Assuming there was... Still think about those numbers!! 1 out of 100 adults have autism... where are they?

Next time you are in church, the grocery store, the office or even at a family function.... remember 1% of the people in attendance should (according to this research) have autism.

The truth is that there are still children who are developing typically who have a sudden regression; how can we ignore this common sense? But... Dr. Wakefield's research was discredited, right? Interesting how every politician, scientist, doctor or mom that speaks out about this connection is discredited. Who is making that determination... big pharm, scientists funded by the manufacturers, politicians with deep pockets?

Certainly, not the mothers and fathers who painstakingly watched their child regress into autism.

But.. for the sake of argument, let's assume these numbers are accurate... then how are these adult autistics functioning and who is taking care of them? Daily and often through the night I strategize how our daughter is going to be able to develop the appropriate skills and resources to live a productive life now and into adulthood... And yet, here we have 1% of the populace doing it without intervention... I am not buying it!

(And I mean NO disrespect if you are an adult experiencing autism...)

Finally, I have to reiterate mercury not is safe for the human body, brain or nervous system… guys in the yellow suits w/ masks are deployed when a thermometer breaks in a high-school science lab or at the local VOA store (those are true stories)… And, of course, the FDA advises pregnant women to reduce their consumption of fish during pregnancy because of the mercury content... Yet, we are injecting it directly into pregnant women through the RhoGam shot or young infants and children via routine and flu vaccines…

This research just doesn’t lay the autism/vaccine connection to rest for me. In fact, I see it as a way to try to pacify a community that is getting louder and a smoke screen for the rest of the people.

Mothers, Will You Unite With Me?

Today is 9/9/09 and the voices of our children are about to be heard. I invite you to advocate for the one out of 100 children that are diagnosed with autism. I invite you to be the voice our children do not have. I invite you to be the straw that got the nation to listen!

Nothing ruffles my feathers more than when mothers start to ostracize each other because they have different perspectives on the etiology of autism. Instead of getting into heated debates we should be reaching out and saying, “We agree to disagree, now let’s get things done.”

Let me share with you my perspective.

I find that to say autism can’t be caused by vaccines because your child doesn’t have autism and is fully vaccinated a ridiculous statement. I think that for you to say it can’t be the RhoGam shot because your grandbaby is ‘normal’ and that your daughter got the same shots as I a close minded response. When people say statements like this to me I want to scream, “You are missing the point!”

Let me take a different angle... I started smoking when I was eighteen, and I tinkered with smoking throughout high school and was an avid smoker by the time entered college. For the next ten years, I consistently smoked… sometimes up to two packs a day (graduate school all nighters will do that to you). However, I do not have the dis-ease called lung cancer; why? I smoked and smoking causes cancer. So, is it logical for me to conclude that smoker must NOT cause cancer?

My point is this… just because your child didn’t regress into autism doesn’t mean that the risk and dangers aren’t there. I am not against vaccinations; I oppose the toxins and second most dangerous substance known to man being willingly shoved into our children and expectant mothers. Do you know what your child would be like it he hadn’t been vaccinated? Maybe he would have been even more extraordinary!

Most mothers I know would go to the ends of the Earth for what she believed to be the right thing for her child. I am asking us, mothers, to unite together and use this energy to create a shift. Not just on your home front but nationally.

Demand that the government, scientists, pharmaceutical companies, and media admit we have a national crisis among this generation of children. Demand that fetus, infants, toddlers, and children are no longer subjected to mercury. Demand that we get 3^rd party research from unbiased scientists. Demand that we get the tools we need to see that our children can live productive and healthy lives.

Mother Rebel

I didn’t wake up one morning a mother rebel and decide to piss off all of my family and friends. In fact, I didn’t reveal my mothering style to anyone for many years (as it was a personal decision between my husband and me). It wasn’t until after I recorded my research and experiences in The Mother Consciousness that I started to openly talk about our lifestyle.

I entered my stance on holistic mothering with caution; researching as much literature that I could get my hands on. I have spent countless hours filtering through research articles, documents, online resources and books. I have read many different perspectives pertaining to different mothering and health practices. I have weighed out the facts, sifted through consequences, and rendered personal decisions.

I, also, put the energy forth to not take the inventory of other mothers whom views may differ from my own. However, I have made it my business to inform others about my findings… why?

Because… until I entered a conversation with a health care professional about vaccines, I didn’t know I had a right to question the constructs man had instituted upon mothers. I was naive to the mere fact that I had a right to make an educated mindful choice about the physical, emotional and spiritual well being of my off spring. After some self-discovery, I determined that I had the inherent right to raise my kids as I deemed in their best interest… even if that meant going against the grain. Empowered with knowledge and maternal instinct, I knew that some stranger in a white lab coat or Armani suit did not have the power to dictate how we were going to raise our children.

Man is fallible; if you want to know how I reached that conclusion read my book. In The Mother Consciousness I talk about the series of events that awakened the natural mother within me including the death of my father, the brutality of a cervical biopsy, being misinformed about the future of my ability to bear children, the sexual abuse in America, and more.

I do have a pet peeve with some of the mothers that have not made the decisions I have… not because they choose a different lifestyle, that is their right too. In all honesty, I usually keep my mouth shut about their practices in order to avoid the agonizing confrontation and I believe that you have the right to raise your kids how you see fit. However, after many discussions with other mothers who have similar perspectives and after talking with those who don’t, I conclude that many women in the holistic movement feel forced to defend their mothering philosophies.

I no longer have the energy to defend myself… until you have a child that is suspected to have a vaccine injury and until you have tried to participate in attachment / holistic mothering you cannot rationally condemn my perspectives. Frankly, if my mothering practices offend you, make you feel less than, or stimulate something uneasy in you, that is your issue not mine. Simply don’t read what I post here on my Alterna-mom blog, Twitter or Facebook. And certainly, don’t buy my book, The Mother Consciousness. I do not force this life style (which takes much energy and focus) on anyone. But, as a wellness educator, I will inform you so that you too can make an educated decision. And if that decision is different than the one I’d make, that is okay, because you made it mindfully.

I decided not vaccinate my children before autism was intimately in our lives.

I do associate the 3 injections of a vaccine they mandated I take because of my Rh negative blood to my daughter’s autism.

I understand that to vaccinate is a choice, not something that doctors or government should mandate or force you to do.

I believe it is illogical to put thimersol into a pregnant or lactating woman.

I acknowledge that natural immunity is far superior to the toxins forced into your infant and child’s body.

I question the effects of the mother’s vaccination history on her offspring.

I do think the breast is best.

I advocate that women nurse their children beyond infancy; the world average is 4 years.

I think it is normal for women to tandem nurse siblings that have resulted from single births.

I know the home is the best place to birth during an uncomplicated labor and delivery.

I correlate medication and institutionalized birthing to the pestilence of sickness among our children.

If I had had a son I would have left him whole and intact the way our creator intended him to be.

I think co-sleeping with your child fosters trust and security.

I know that the power that created the body has the power to heal the body.

I trust that a fever is an expression of health.

I understand that when a mother works away from the children they are exposed to possible abuse and neglect.

I know the mother is the best caregiver for her children.

If you are in alignment of my views, I am glad we have connected and look forward to expanding our Mother Consciousness together. If you are intrigued I am glad you have an open mind and invite you to learn more. If you cannot relate to any of this simply hit the x button, turn away and move on… don’t try to convince me my views are wrong and in return, I will not disrespect your views; let’s simply agree to disagree.